The White House Automated Answering System

January/01/2013 7:48AM
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Today I tried to reach President Obama to wish him the best for 2013. Also, I had some ideas to cut government spending. As you might expect, I got an automated answering message. Here’s the message.

Press 1 if we can cut you a check for any reason

Press 2 to make a contribution to my eternal campaign fund

Press 3 to speak to someone about a labor union issue

Press 4 to speak to someone about an environmental issue

Press 5 to talk to someone about raising taxes

Any accredited media, except Fox News, press 6 to speak to David Axelrod directly

Any Hollywood celebrity may press 7 to speak to Michelle directly(except Oprah, of course)

Any illegal immigrant seeking immediate citizenship press 8 for the automated green card line. If you are on the other side of one of our borders, press 9 for an escort across.

Anyone with any idea about cutting government spending, press zero for an operator.

So, I pressed zero. I got a recorded message that said, “the high level of calls is resulting in a long wait time. The estimated wait time is 4 years and 24 days”.

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